Mama wants her medicine!

Sorry I haven't written in so long! I haven't been feeling well. I've been nauseous, weird taste in my mouth, gained 10 lbs since January, I get so hot I feel like ripping my clothes off, tired, and more. You know what's worse than being pregnant and feeling crappy? Not being pregnant and feeling like you are! I haven't had a period since January 12. That would make me 9 weeks preg, if I were. But I'm apparently not. I went to the doc yesterday and he did an ultra sound and I'm not preg. He said my ovaries looked like they were on vacation. Derek asked if they left a note saying, Vacationing on the beach, wish you were here! He cracks himself up! I got some blood drawn for blood work. We'll see if that shows anything odd. My sister thinks my body is reacting like I'm preg because I haven't had a period in so long. That makes sense since my body is used to being preg. So here I sit with no coffee because it doesn't taste good. WHAT! Yeah, this 2 cup drinkin mama can't even drink one anymore. Now the other part to this problem is my medicine. Which I stopped taking a few weeks ago because I thought I was preg. Back in Nov. I went to the doctor with tons of stress and anxiety, mostly from Tyler, and not able to fall asleep for hours. She put me on Paxil and life was GRAND! I wasn't full of anxiety if my house wasn't spotless, Tyler didn't stress me to the point of yelling anymore, and I went to sleep when I hit the pillow! But when I didn't have my period and started having preg. symptoms, I weened myself off. So now not only do I have all those crappy preg. symptoms, but I also have the stress, anxiety, and I lay awake for hours at night scarred of every little noise. I was going to stay off the Paxil and try to get pregnant. But I think my sister was right when she said maybe this isn't God's timing for another baby. I think I'll start the medicine again!

I told you all this just in case someone needed a good laugh, or maybe someone has felt the same way and was too afraid to take medicine. Like for some reason if you love God, He should be enough for you and you shouldn't have to take medicine. Well, I love God, am a Christ follower, am a minister's wife, seek after God's will for my life, take my bible to the waiting room in the doctor's office and do my Beth Moore bible study, and I take Paxil! I don't in any way feel condemned by anyone, but I'm the type of person who wouldn't care anyway. But for all those out there who are afraid of being condemned, pray about it and don't worry about what other people think!

Sorry there's no cute pics of the kids! I'll update again soon!